Tuesday, November 22, 2016

Garage and other woes

A couple of weeks ago, Spencer moved back in with us for a couple of months.  Believe me when I tell you, it gave me the shivers typing 'a couple of months' as I believe it will be closer to the end of January (or February).  At least that is what I tell myself, rather than be disappointed when January gets here and he is still no closer than being out on his own for good.

He came here one day, moving boxes into the newly cleaned and arranged garage, and gave me lip about borrowing the vacuum.  Oh, and his displeasure with the van.  Which belongs still to ME.  I won't go into great detail here, but basically I told him he could pack all of his crap back into  the van, dump it all at Goodwill, and bring me MY van and keys back.  I might have done that in a loud voice for all of the neighbors to hear.  But in my defense, if they have boomerang kids, they understand..

Instead, he calmly unloaded his crap, and went back to his apartment for another load.
Today I went out there, organized it all, washed his nasty dishes and towels, and made more space in my garage.  Question:  Have I lost my mind?  My mother claims I have no common sense.  But it's my house, and we have to be able to navigate the garage for two more months.  Plus, my idiot child packed DIRTY dishes and clothes, and brought and empty boxes (no roaches wanted, thank you) and has been going back and forth from his room to the garage for forgotten items.  Am I the one with no common sense to want a member of my family to make strides forward so I can get the hell out of here guilt-free?   Burnet awaits, even with Hubby acting the fool over getting the property clean and pristine before the holidays.
Please advise.

Tuesday, November 8, 2016

The last time for a while...

This is the last post I will write about my sister for a while.  I feel like I am harping on her, and really, I don't wish it to be that way.  I've actually been remembering her in my prayers this week as I have come to the belief that she is having a very hard time in life.  Obviously.  I'm sorry about that, on her behalf.  I wish life wasn't terrible for her.  But, on the other hand, I think she took it out on my mother and that makes me feel a little less charitable.  Know this:  as people age in physical years, they tend to regress somewhat emotionally.  It's altogether too easy to hurt my mother's feelings, even if unintentional.  But why would you purposely do so?  Why would you intentionally hurt your elderly mother's feelings when she is already physically hurting with a broken arm?  Why do you seize the opportunity to kick her when she is already down?  Why would you state to her "I'm coming to get you", drive 2 hours to take her to your house, then spend the next three weeks whining and crying to her about how crappy you feel like your childhood was?  Treat her like an imposition?  Tell her you are "getting tired of being the maid"?   It's abusive and insensitive.  Get over yourself and grow up.  Look around you at all you have achieved and accumulated - a job, an education, a nice home.  Do you not think that your mother was instrumental in you getting to this point in your life?

In my opinion, it's elder abuse.  My mother doesn't cry all that often, but lately she's been telling me she cries every day.  That makes me want to drive to my sister's house and punch her dumb face.  I still love her, as my sister, I can't help it.  But I hate her as a person.  And as a daughter, she leaves much to be desired as well.
OK, that's all.  I need to pray that God looks after her, and move on.  And my mother has agreed to do so, too.  Seems like I wasn't the only one enjoying a toxic relationship  with her.  And I feel like I need to see and call my mother even more often to make sure she is OK.