The worry about your kids doesn't stop when they get grown. It just changes shape a bit.
That was a revelation to me. I figured that once they were all settled in to their adult lives, all would be well. After all, it's fair to say that Mark and I struggled mightily to raise four kids, having no extended family to guide us. Adolescence strained the limits of our parenting knowledge. So we figured once we got them to the edge of the nest, they would fly. And little did I realize that leaving the nest is not all that simple a transition.
I myself could not WAIT to get the hell out on my own. My home was always filthy dirty, with broken things all around, very little money, and constant worry on my mother's part. I had a sister who ran away from home and a brother who was constantly into trouble. I worked hard in school, had a plan for college, and worked part-time, and the upheaval at home made me eager to leave as soon as I could. I knew my mother was proud of me and loved me, but I was ready to have my own space that was clean, and calm, and mine. I was OK with being alone for the most part - but I wasn't really alone because I did have Mark.
Chloe has Teddy. And while he is a source of love and comfort to her, he is after all, a dog. He can't hold conversations or her hand after a long day. He can't help pay the bills. Come pick her up when her car dies. Make dinner a couple nights a week. Or share the burden of laundry and apartment cleaning. And Chloe is now 26, so I worry that she is settling rather permanently into this single, alone life. That's not what I envisioned for her. I know it's not my life to live, but I worry just the same.
At the end of the day, I just want to know that she is happy and doing what she wants to do. But I also want her future to be full of more than just Teddy.
