Touchy feelies

 And I'm not referring to this cactus:

I wouldn't try to be hugging this, myself.

I got into a bit of trouble for not sending out a message to my peeps on Father's Day.  To tell you the truth, it was a hard day for me.  I lost the man who was father to my kids aka My Loss, Too.  I had time to think about it since then, and I came to the conclusion that I should have sent them all a little something. So, just like at Christmastime*, I wrote something to each of them first thing on Sunday morning to acknowledge that it was the 2 year anniversary.  It was important to me that they didn't just suddenly realize that, later in the day.  I wanted to remind each one of them that he left a legacy of love and pride in his family and we can choose to make that the focus of our memory of him.  Now, would they have remembered the date themselves? Possibly. I didn't send it as a group text, because literally no one likes getting or responding to those.  And by mid-afternoon, two of them responded.  And that's because not everyone loves a touchy feelie note to remind them of a terrible day, and maybe they also didn't need me to suggest that this day was more than just an occasion to cry. 

I mean, if that's what they want to do, fine.  Crying can be cathartic.

But just because they don't mention that they got the message doesn't mean I won't do it again in the future.  The subject of Mark is going to come up again and again and again and again...and eventually we will smile more than we cry.  At least that is my touchy feely hope.

*No one said a thing about the touchy feely Christmas card, but oh well.

If it ain't broke, I fixed it

Lately I think "if it ain't broke, I fixed it"*.

I have hired someone to take care of some things {the sprinkler system, the alarm system, mower maintenance, tree trimming, repair of the backyard faucet, repair of a water pipe at Highlands}.  But I have also been the one doing the fixing {hung a bamboo shade, cleaned and purged the garage and closets, cleaned the A/C compressor, re-caulked my tub, mow and edge the yards regularly, cleaned and resealed the deck, refinished the kitchen cabinets}.

my humble abode

Last week I used my new sander to smooth out the door frame so the front door would stop sticking.  I also replaced the door sweep, as well as painted,  the back door.  Sometimes as I am doing these things, I think "well, this isn't working out to be perfect", but what is?

(I also sing a little ditty to myself called "you will not defeat me" in an operatic voice)

  Even Mark had a learning curve.  I can imagine him fixing something for the first time, doing his best and knowing that a done something was better than a perfect nothing.  Sure, there was cussing sometimes, same as me.  I also imagine him cheering me on, urging me not to give up.  I'm learning a lot about things I never thought I would need to.  And I hope he would be proud of me.

*Grayson's version is "if it ain't broke, don't break it"

Happy things for July 2023

 I am settling in to my new shift, though for the last couple of weeks I have been working extra hours and taking a tad bit extra call.  And while everything is not peachy, some things are, and I am holding on to those things as hard as I can!  There will always be sad things, but here are the happy ones:

my desk at work - yes I am eating breakfast here...

*Highlands sold in a week, and for what I expected to get, without me even getting someone to mow it.  The new owner even wants the canoe and the trailer, and that is a load off my mind.

*My boss fixed my pay - I wasn't receiving the full weekend differential.  So not only are my paychecks bigger than what they were when I was working 40 hours M-F, I got back pay for that missing differential.

*My nails are still growing and look great.

*My cholesterol is down.

*I dropped Facebook and am on Instagram far less.

*My mother did well in her surgery and is at home, resting and recovering.

*I am moving forward with big projects at home - next up is bathroom floors.